We all want to learn how to live a happy
life. For a long time I wondered what it took to be
sincerely happy and have inner peace.
As I pursued money, relationships, and career success, I thankfully
realized that happiness doesn’t come from the outside; happiness comes from
within each of us. Eureka.
It is something that is present all the
time within you and me. Imagine the
layers of an onion being your negative beliefs, thoughts, and fears. As we peel
away the layers, (what you are not), we eventually reach the core (who you
really are). We are all here on Earth to find meaning and purpose.
Learning how to live a happy life is not
about locking yourself in a closet and meditating for the rest of your
life. We as human beings are designed to set and achieve goals, so we need
goals to feel fulfilled. These are all only a piece of the pie of
living a happy life, but we have to keep in mind that it is not the external
things in our lives that make us happy, but rather what is going on inside
of us.
MAKING the CHOICE TO CHANGE
It all begins with the choice to be
happier, to start studying the commonalities of “happy people.” What are they doing? How do they think? How
do they face challenges? Most people want something for nothing. If your life isn’t as good as you want it to
be right now, you are the only one that can change it for the better.
We have to become clear about what we
want in life and who we want to be. We
do not have to settle for mediocrity. Almost every limit in our lives we set
ourselves. Think about that for a
moment. Most of the negative beliefs we
have, we have learned from society, friends, and even parents.
These beliefs can all be eliminated. We can take control of our own destiny and be
happy. We can shape our future, to be
healthy and productive. Now, I realize
that we can’t “control” everything in life, but we certainly can create a happy
life if we choose to.
Taking Responsibility
You alone are responsible for your life. You
may think you have “valid” excuses/ reasons of why you’re not as
successful or happy, as you should be. Guess what? Our excuses don’t matter, because they won’t
change anything. Do you want to give
your excuses the power of controlling your life? Or do you want to reclaim the power that
you’ve always had? It is God-given to
all of us.
We can whine, blame, and make excuses all
we want, but it will only keep us stuck. If we look at some of the happiest and
most successful people, you will notice that most of them did not come from
privileged backgrounds. In fact, many
of them had to face brutal challenges in order to get to where they are.
The ironic thing is that it wasn’t their problems or challenges that held
them back from a happier life. The drama
and problems we face in life, can help us grow as human beings if we have the
courage to face them and get through them.
Personal Growth
Learning how to live a happy life is about
learning how we work. It is up to us to take control of our own
being. By that I mean our thoughts, our
health, and the path we follow. We can
go after dreams and we can make a living doing what we want if we just make the
decision to do so.
It really isn’t any harder than
that. Learning how to live a happy life…
almost happens on its own when you make the decision that you are going to be
happy and not miserable.
Goals
When we make the decision to be happy, the
next step is to set clear goals of what we want to achieve in each of the main
areas of our life. The main areas
in life are: health, work, relationships, and personal growth!
Use the SMART
criteria, which stands for:
• Specific
• Measurable
• Attainable
• Realistic
• Timely
I used these in teaching and my students
would later contact me and say they still found them powerful in their chosen
careers, personal lives, and future goals.
Metaphorically, many choose to sit in the
passenger seat of the “car” that is their life. They let the car go where it
wants to go and then complain when it ends up in a wrong place or worse yet,
a ditch! Successful and happy
people take control of the wheel and steer the car where they want to go.
Small Steps
Never underestimate how much you can
accomplish just by taking one single step, each day, toward your goals. Learning how to live a happy life is
about focusing on the tasks that have the biggest impact on your life. It is up to us to focus on changing our individual habits and beliefs.
When we set goals, we then know the
direction we need to go. We don’t have
to know exactly how you will get there, but you do have to take one step every
single day, or as often as possible to make it happen.
Action
Nothing happens without action. Don’t talk about it; do it! When you can
take consistent action in the right direction and work on the most valuable
tasks, you can accomplish anything you want.
Most people underestimate the power of focus, determination, and action.
When you’ve found a goal that sets your soul on fire and makes joy pump through
your veins, it will be almost impossible for you not to take action.
For me, it was improving the lives of
children who face challenges and lives that are difficult without
intervention. I felt like I had
to do it, but didn’t know where or how to start. Quickly, I learned that excuses, fears, or
obstacles could not stand in the way. It has been
in the journey that I have learned to be the happiest. I have failed
so many times, but still I persist.
Determination
It wasn’t until I got this fire inside me
that I started making progress. Something funny happens when you make the
choice to live a happy life. It’s almost as if the universe conspires to help
you. Learning how to live a happy life keeps coming back to the decision… to
actually do it. Our lives will never be perfect and the stars will never
accurately align. The “perfect” circumstances we need… will not occur
until we actually take action.
It is each of us who has to take the first
step. It can’t be done for us.
Follow Your Passion
Most of us know what our heart yearns for,
but we are afraid to go after it. It is often the thing that
we’re afraid of doing, but desperately want to do, that is our
passion and purpose in life. I remember
a few years ago before I started writing as a profession. I was afraid that I had nothing to contribute
to the world with my writing and I was afraid of the fact that I wasn’t good
enough.
Fortunately, I stood up to my fears.
I wasn’t going to let anything stand in my way of doing what I love.
Amazingly, as I started writing, dozens of people read and responded to my
writing. As of right now, tens of
thousands of people read my words every single month.
I sincerely believe that the fears we
have about going after our passion are unfounded. They are there to challenge
and to see if we are truly serious about living a happy and
fulfilling life. It is scary, but I’d say that living a life full of
excuses and fear is worse than going after your dreams. So what if you fail? You are living the life of happiness… in the
pursuit.
